It’s natural to be unsure when trying something new, and I understand it may feel like a big step to contact a therapist – many of us feel hesitant about opening up to someone we don’t know. I’ll do my best to put you at your ease, and offer a warm and compassionate space for you to talk at your own pace – you may find it a relief to speak honestly about how you’re feeling.

Most people who commit to counselling or psychotherapy find it has been a worthwhile investment in themselves. Therapy has helped many people by supporting them during difficult times in their lives, helping to explore and make sense of individual experiences, thoughts and feelings, and to move forward in a more positive way. As you grow in self-awareness and develop insight into your responses to situations, and your relationships with others, you’ll find yourself applying this understanding to current and future situations.

Whether face-to-face or online, the first session offers an opportunity to meet each other and assess how well we might work together, without making any commitment to attending further sessions. You’ll get a good idea of what therapy sessions together would be like, and I’ll encourage you to notice how you feel and whether my approach seems helpful for you.

I’ll explain a little about counselling, and answer any questions you may have. You can then talk about whatever you want to – many people find it helpful to describe what has brought them to counselling, and what they hope to gain from the experience. I’ll need to ask some questions to help me understand what is going on now, and a little of your background. It will be your choice whether to disclose any difficult or painful experiences – these would be further explored when therapy is established and ongoing (should you decide to continue).

Therapy offers space to talk about whatever you need to. Some people wish to focus on current situations or recent life events. For others, it may be helpful to revisit past events or experiences if they continue to affect the present. If you feel you are stuck in repeating patterns of behaviour or relationships, it can be useful to look at how these might have arisen.

For those who have experienced past trauma I recommend approaching this gradually and carefully during longer-term therapy to avoid the risk of re-traumatising.

There is no single answer to this question, since people’s individual needs vary. I offer both short-term counselling (often 6-12 sessions), and longer-term psychotherapy. We can discuss what might be appropriate for you in the initial session and review this as we go along, or we can work for an agreed number of sessions.

Whether short or longer term, I’d encourage you to prioritise attending weekly sessions, as progress is made more quickly when therapy is a regular commitment.

It is your choice how long you wish to continue with your sessions. Whenever you are thinking of stopping therapy it’s best to discuss this together so we can plan to bring the work to an end. It’s recommended to allow at least a session to finish short-term counselling, and more to successfully end long-term therapy.

When some areas of our lives are going well, we may believe our worries are not important enough to ask for help with. Sometimes this can reflect the deeper issue of thinking that we ourselves are not important enough to invest in, or to take up another’s time and attention.

If you feel worried, or sad, or cannot seem to resolve an aspect of your life which troubles you, these are problems which are worth addressing in order to live life more as you wish to.

Some of us may be fortunate in having friends or family who we can talk through our problems with, however there can also be times when they are unable to help. It could be that whatever is troubling you is simply too difficult to talk about with those closest to you, or perhaps they offer opinions or advice that may not feel helpful. Sometimes we can feel that we are over-burdening friends or loved ones with our problems, and wish to protect them by seeking the support we need from elsewhere.

Each experience of therapy is different – people are not all the same, and that goes for counsellors too. There are various theories and approaches to therapy which mean therapists may work quite differently to each other – for instance, if you’ve had CBT before my sessions will feel different.

However, even therapists trained in the same counselling theories will develop distinct individual approaches. Research has shown that a good relationship with your therapist is the most important indicator of a positive outcome, so if you didn’t get what you hoped for from a previous experience it might be worth trying again.

I always recommend weekly sessions when establishing therapy and for making progress more quickly. Attending sessions less frequently affects the momentum - usually there is more to catch up on between meetings, and less time in the sessions for the work of therapy. Many therapists see greater progress being made during weekly sessions, than over the same number of sessions attended fortnightly.

However, when therapy is well established and improvements are being experienced, some people find it helpful to reduce to fortnightly sessions for a while before ending therapy.